Log in

No account? Create an account
Fuck the French
[Most Recent Entries] [Calendar View] [Friends]

Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Fuck the French's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]
Thursday, February 15th, 2007
1:36 am
Wednesday, January 11th, 2006
4:34 pm
Fucking the French, ikilled007 style
It's easy to fuck the French if you are ikilled007.


Current Mood: amused
Thursday, January 5th, 2006
4:52 pm
Tuesday, December 13th, 2005
6:45 pm
Thursday, December 8th, 2005
9:58 am
An e-mail from my dad . . .
French: Classic Comments,

"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these
drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by
prostitutes." --Mark Twain.

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one
behind me." --General George S. Patton.
"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your
accordion." --Norman Schwartzkopf.

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it."
--Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure." --Jacques Chirac,
President of France
"As far as France is concerned, you're right." --Rush Limbaugh,

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is
sitting in Paris sipping coffee." --Regis Philbin.

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any
better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit
outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more
stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whisky I don't
know." --P.J O'Rourke (1989).

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the
1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the
face for it." --John McCain, U.S. Senator

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he
hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French,
people." --Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get
Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get Hitler out of
France either" --Jay Leno.

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into
Paris under a German flag." --David Letterman

"Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada."
--Ted Nugent.

"War without France would be like ... uh ... World War II."

"The favorite bumper sticker in Washington D.C. right now is one that says
'First Iraq, then France.'" --Tom Brokaw.

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its
national will fighting against Disney World and Big Macs than the Nazis?"
--Dennis Miller.

"It is important to remember that the French have always been there when
they needed us." --Alan Kent

"They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for an
attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, and a
three-day supply of mistresses in the house." --Argus Hamilton

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being
advertised on eBay the other day -- the description was, 'Never shot.
Dropped once'." --Rep. Roy Blount (MO)

"The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found
truffles in Iraq." --Dennis Miller

Q. What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the
city in WWII?
A. Table for 100,000 m'sieur?

"Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris? It's not known,
it's never been tried." --Rep. Roy Blount (MO)

"Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in WWII?
And that's because it was raining." --John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv.

French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney - (AP), Paris, March 5, 2003
The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use
of fireworks at Euro Disney. The decision comes the day after a nightly
fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris,
caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a
group of Czech tourists.
Monday, October 31st, 2005
3:00 pm
Saturday, October 1st, 2005
2:19 pm
'Lo there folks.
I'm British. I used to live in a nice house in England. Then my stemp-mum decided we should all move to France. I used to love France, that was before I lived there.
French people are all scary and they like to molest me on the bus.
And croissants just aren't that great.
So yeah. I don't like France.
Thursday, July 7th, 2005
11:48 am
dang ol' surrender monkeys man, Ronald Reagan should have dropped the bomb on them when he had the chance
Friday, June 10th, 2005
9:01 am
French "men"
French men yearn for pregnancy

PARIS -- Almost 40 per cent of French men told a recent survey that they would like to, science permitting, become pregnant.
The poll -- conducted by Ipsos and published in the current issue of Children Magazine (Enfants Magazine) -- showed that 38 per cent of the more than 500 fathers of children up to seven interviewed by phone said they would like, or would have liked, to be the one to carry their offspring to term.

Anyone surprised? The hardest part about polling French men is distinguishing them from French women.
Friday, December 3rd, 2004
6:15 pm
FTF - Moderator Post
So apparantly, it appears a few people don't quite understand from the userinfo the purpose of this community.

FTF is not a 'HERE ARE PHOTOS OF FRENCH PEOPLE WHO ARE SOOO KEWL' community, but it seems like recent posts have been along that theme.

As a result, all future posts to this community must be approved by a moderator before it sees the light of day. If you fail to see your francophile-themed post slobbering over some French actor/model, you know it's been rejected.

Now stop pestering us. Or I shall mock you a second time!

Current Mood: annoyed
7:18 pm
What about Eleanor of Aquitaine?

Stone cold fox - you can judge by this excerpt:

"It was said that Queen Eleanor appeared at Vézelay dressed like an Amazon galloping through the crowds on a white horse, urging them to join the crusades."

Married to the king at 15 and by age 19, she's rallying troops? Definitely hot. :)
3:06 pm
5:36 pm
Did everyone forget Audrey Tautou?
4:53 pm
How could we forget...
The Marquis de Lafayette?

He helped free America from our English oppressors. And he was pretty!

10:50 am
Marion Cotillard!

sorry about this one being weird. it was too hot to pass up!
7:00 pm
Just to remind everyone that there are still some French men alive worth fucking
And how. Jean-Marc Barr, star of Le Grand Bleu and, errr, other stuff. No really. Here he is in all his piercingly-blue-eyed glory :

How cute is this guy? Doesn't this picture :

just make you want to cuddle him to death?

He's aged nicely too. Now he looks kinda like an even sexier Jean-Luc Picard.

I so would.

And by the way, if anyone want to slash him with Jean Reno for me, here's a spot of inspiration :

And now I ded from cute.

Current Mood: *drool*
12:09 pm
Baby loves a bunch of authors

Albert Camus
Absurdist writer/philosopher associated with existentialism. He wrote several novels and essays, including L'étranger and, my personal favorite, the essay "The Myth of Sisyphus." He won the Nobel Prize in literature. If this guy weren't dead, I'd be all over him.

French enlightenment writer and philosopher. A great satirist. Best known for his novel Candide. Mmm, satire.

René Descartes
And who hasn't heard of the "I think, therefore I am" guy? Philosophy is so hot.

And how can you have a community about fucking the French without the original sadist himself...

The Marquis de Sade!
Pornographic writer and philosopher. Got into trouble for beating up some prostitutes and being a general nuisance, but even in the prisons and nuthouses, this guy knew how to have a good time.
10:21 am
Marie and Pierre Curie

Marie was born in Poland, but was so drawn to France and the French that she married Pierre... :D

Oh yeah, and they also did that nifty thing of discovering radioactivity!

Marie won 2 Nobel Prizes in 2 different fields (Physics and Chemistry) and Pierre won the Physics Nobel Prize as well.
4:13 pm
Sorry if this is OT but they're all still baisable
I made some icons for the community!

The legs...

...of the beautiful Catherine Deneuve :

Everyone's favourite gappy-toothed lovely.

And every housewife's fantasy, the craquant Daniel Auteuil (just a base, I am terrible at thinking of witty slogans. Woe)

Current Mood: bored
5:31 am

General Joseph Gallieni, French Minister of War

They called him out of retirement to organize the defense of Paris at the outset of World War I. During the First Battle of the Marne, when the Germans came within sight of Paris, he persuaded Joffre to bring in the Sixth Army and rounded up over 600 taxicabs to shuttle reserve troops to the front. Which is totally fucking awesome. Trés fuckable.
[ << Previous 20 ]
About LiveJournal.com